Suffering behind the closed door

When I was bed bound and I had a catheter in my bladder I felt a lot of pain in my bladder and it was not being empty by the catheter it felt very uncomfortable. someone used become to my room in the middle of the night to empty the bag because it was not big enough to last for the whole night and when they came I sometimes said I am in pain are you sure that it's connected properly, I have just spent nearly a month a big hospital and I was afraid of that. I don't know whether it was deliberate but they said to me some night night if you keep complaining we will send you back to the hospital. I was so lonely and so afraid I believed them I thought I was in pain and I would have to go to A and E. so I thought I'd better not go to sleep. after few nights like this I was not able to sleep and I went from being able to sleep fo 18 months. Until I came home. other times they were refused to change the disposable pads that the bedbound people had to wear and I was so for them if you don't change this I'm going and I was so for them if you don't change this I'm going to wet the bed. they just laughed because I was helpless. I would have liked to kill them I would still like to kill them. human beings are very cruel especially when alone with someone helpless. behind this closed doors. Who knows what is happening?

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