A lot to think about : Wandering through a Care Home

https://www.grosvenorlodgehove.co.uk/care/lifting-the-stigma-on-elderly-care ois a fact of life, from the moment we are born, we start getting older and if we are lucky enough to live to an old age, it is likely we may come to a point where we can no longer care properly for ourselves and we may need some extra support. And yet this is something none of us want to admit or even think about, but if we are all going to need it, why is there such a stigma around elderly care and what can we do to change future perspective? Perhaps, by thinking negatively about getting old and frail and not being able to look after ourselves we are the problem. Constantly in the media and movies, people in older age are depicted negatively, whether it’s as a burden to the family, or someone who is unable to look after themselves, the older generations do not get painted in a good light. And yet so many of us are staying healthy and active into our older years and nothing like the old frail image portr

1. [singular] : a set of negative and often unfair beliefs that a society or group of people have about something. the stigma associated with mental illness = the stigma of mental illness. the stigma of being poor = the stigma of poverty. There's a social stigma attached to receiving welfare. https://www.britannica.com › stigma Stigma Definition & Meaning | Britannica Dictionary More results

Mo st of the residents in their room alone or. many cannot even go to the toilets for change of scene Somrcan go to the dining room

if you RN nursing home are you receive very very old and got dementia if you fall out with flu or pneumonia not much incentive to get better because you cannot see a future for yourself other than what you see in these people around you sitting and watching the television or just sitting doing nothing all day long. some don't have visitotd. why get well. you will only have to go through this again and again until you die so why not die now?

since it requires two people to put someone into a wheelchair with a hoist quite frequently people are told to soil themselves. . there will be cleaned after they have soiled themselves but it won't be within the first 10 minutes or even half an hour. I'd like to know what people think

Why don't the staff meet our eyes times we are treated as less than fully human. The first visit to our room in the morning will be the night Nurse. She will bring early morning medication. At this time possibly 6 am it's likely We will not have seen anyone since 8:30 the night before and if you haven't slept that's a very long time to be alone. So you want some human contact just someone's eyes looking at you and meeting your eyes not necessarily any conversation. But they are keen to get on with their work and they don't want to engage with any individual that's my interpretation of it so they don't actually make themselves present in the room for even 2 or 3 minutes. So when they leave sometimes we feel very sad because you won't see anybody else until we get a cup of tea at maybe 7 am That's the most obvious lack but it can happen in the daytime as well that somebody is with you is he might even wash you but they don't actually yo

many people in nursing homes I'm just waiting to die. actually said to me I want to die I wish I could die. one begged me to kill hrr don't put your telative in one of these places is absolutely impossible to care for them at home. o

if you have your own room you may believe that you are got privacy. I had one drawer which I was using for my private things when several times clean it eithe how to empty 8 onto my bed without asking my permission when I was on the grounds that there might be some crumbs in it. this time while I was out of the room because they wanted to clean the floor really but when I went back we are turning all my positions not including my codes fortunately and they put books notebooks pens spectacles jewellery all jumped on my bed to anyone at all to see and cleaning woman and took out my private drawer and was about empty it onto the bed. play I was left to put everything back and during the following night I became ill with severe chest infection and I'm still ill now. I find it extremely intrusive and I never believed that no one could have the right to go through my personal belongings without me being there or without my permission. I felt assaulted. I had not realised how far they wo

in the subject of economics people who can work are called labour and their numbers from 1 to 3 up to thousands or millions of people who can work and so you can compare one country with another and st. France has got twice as much lab as as England. the people are replaceable units who moved about a at will. I wonder it is the same in a nursing home where the people are units and have to be kept clean and well fed and generally kept for but they may not be related to as individuals because that would need a lot of energy that would need a lot of energy and time. but you can see in a Christian country we cannot allow people to be treated basically as Christianity or indeed Islam or would tell us. people creation of God to be respected and treated with care. of course this is all m ideal. even if everywhere trying to treat them that way we might not be successful

Lady was screaming. She is 100 years old that she has a severe spinal problem at the base. She is only giving painkillers don't always seem to work very well and she's an extrovert so she likes to see people, don't we all. I mentioned her to one of the staff as you said to me oh don't worry about her she only wants attention. Like she only wants air and water 

I'm hoping to go back home and so I have a social worker to assess my needs. She went to my house last week and when she came back she said to me There is some crockery in your washing up bowl. I was taken into a&e by ambulance and I could not stand up therefore I left dishes in the sink. And she said there are some pans on your hob. They are keen. So she said how do you expect somewhere to eat your meals when there is crockery in the sink? Well personally I don't cook in the sink. Tito K

I believe that we should observe the Sabbath if we are Christians. But last Sunday the 4th of march I was tol. I was throwing it was only the floor but when I went back to my room my bed was covered with all sorts of things from the top of the chest all mixed up together books drawing paper art materials Laptop chords, tablets etc and it took me 3 hours to sort them out and I have not finished yet and I became ill on Sunday night and I've got severe bronchitis. Mysocial worker is coming. When she came last Friday my room was very neat and tidy but no tears are coming with things should have been left on the chest of drawers and I am feeling too ill to sort it all out. I may be getting paranoid wondering why they did this to me especially on a Sunday when I normally have a quiet day. I got out my prayer book but lost it in this mess.

I became ill last night and I was awake till 3 a.m. m M10 I got a bit of sleep . The night nurse would have put that referred to the day staff. But when I went to the day staff and told them I was feeling very unwell they said to me go away don't come near us we don't want to catch it. In the afternoon I felt very cold. At 5 p.m. I asked for some painkillers then a different nurse came. My temperature was very high my blood pressure is very high about 190 systolic Oxygen is 96 She get me some paracetamol and when sheack about 2 hours later my blood pressure reading was 143 on the top. My temperature was 37.4 which was much better and I didn't feel so cold but you see you at the mercy if the staff on duty and they did nothing. 0 if I hadn't called out at 5:30 and got this very good nurse I would have been ill all night. L1

If you are unable to have a shower alone and you have to accept that but if you're fat capable of doing it by yourself and you should be allowed to do so because the more skills we give up up.the lower our self-esteem will be It got to the point that I wasn't allowed to comb my own hair. And they insisted on coming back from my face which I do not like because I have a high forehead . They say it will get in my eyes it's too short for that so in other words they want to meet you into a baby and itself is unpleasant you should be allowed to do what we can while we're still able to do Levi is quicker for them to do it but that should not be allowed to be the main fracture

Some folk are suffering because too much is done for them. It may be very nice sometimes but the carer even objected to me comb my own hair We can become institutionalised I didn't know that the symptoms of hypervigilance. I didn't have that at the beginning but as I progressed end of my first year very very much as so.

One thing which I did not realise at the beginning was that the staff seemed to take all the decisions out of your hands and if you're very ill you may not care But when you are not very well it is demeaning someone who has washed your hair to lift up your hair and comb It's all that was away from your face when you like to have you you parking on one side in the hair and coming forward a little bit. What is the managed to get the phone and Kermit the way I wanted it but then when the carers came back she said you should have it it turned off your face or it will get into your eyes . My hair was so short nothing came near my eyes. I think t's one more contribution to institutionalisation If you've only yiur clothes one day and you think that you could wear them for a second day anyway after all when the carer who wants to send everything to the laundry every single day and that's just ruined a lot of my nightdresses not to mention my day clothes Do they think they

In a nursing home most of the residents will be there till they die. In this place most people are in the 90s and that means that eventually they going to die. My own personal view based on my own experience of grief is that it is much better to tell the other people that someone has died even if they cry and weep. The staff may need to give them a little support and of course the staff may be sad also. I have experienced it because I became very friendly with the lady of 94 in the next room and we had a lot in common. She enjoyed being read to and I was glad to do it. Quite right accident I spent time with her the gay that she died. I really miss her very much because nobody else wants to listen to my poetry. Although I had not known her long I loved here

There is a lady here with dementia and she walked round and round the building a lot At the beginning she walk around just ones and said goodnight to everybody After is Christmas she started doing it 3 times 4 times 5 times and eventually one day she came to my room 30 times to say goodnight and she'll say him to ask me to lend her some pyjamas which I could not do. When we try to stop her from coming round she can get quite angry. There's another lady the same age she's not got dementia but she subs and cries a good deal and she can't walk by herself she has to have a carer or two hairs help her to get out of bed into a chair. She has got very distressed with the woman called Edna and goes round and round say goodnight afraid of her On Saturday I was with the second lady let's call her Magus huge

They are like some other beings altogether the cry more animal than human The wordless pathos, musical,disturbing They have gone back to a troubled and unimagined infancy but no mother responds to such a nightmare of overgrown voice boxes the cry of a rabbit wolf in a trap it’s the shriek in the wall cry of a baby in a psychotic nightmare. Nicholas haunts Sylvia in the evocative memory of Ariel And so it will end for you and me Trapped in this old body with its old brain on and on they cry help me, help me,help me nurse nurse I want the manager I want the manager I don’t want to be here I don’t want to be here I want to go home Help me we don’t listen because they have dementia what they say has no meaning. that’s our defence I am the norm You are abnormal but you smiled when I asked you if you would like your hair dyed pink and I know you love the music therapist. Your smell repels Alas Is this where Jesus dwells If you did this to the least of my little on

do not say do you come here often to one of the other residents especially if they are bed bound. Do not say why have you got a catheter in your bladder to any resident but you can say it to the manager if you want to. They will just think that you've got dementia so they won't blame you for it and they will think you forgotten by the next day. So say it again. Do not make a proposal of marriage during the first week of your stay especially to a member of the same sex or gender as yourself or indeed they may not be binary so beware . And by the way never ask anyone their gender because they may very well have fo rgotten and they may not remember what it is Do not ask another resident to tell you what your gender is because you should know that yourself if you don't know why not ask the manager because they will have been familiar with your and your paperwork and I assume that they put down your gender but I don't know for sure Do not say the tea is horrible during the

This is my opinion that everybody needs some un in her life and especially for people in a rather difficult environment very much h ow can hey have fun The simple way is is socks. Take all your socks over the drawer and pair them up with a different sock not with a matching socks. When the carer comes and says what's an old combination of socks . Then you can say well I've got another pair exactly the same. But will she understand?

While Mary sat in the kitchen on a large pine chair looking at Hotter’s latest shoe catalogue,Annie was creeping up the garden path in a pair of turquoise suede elegantly heeled shoes matching her teal tencel culottes and matching blouse.Round her neck was a large lump of amber on a gold chain handy for beating off muggers or lustful men and women Despite the heat she was in full splendour with golden beige tinted moisturiser from Langone of Lyons on her lovely complexion,pink eyeshadow from Yves St Current and dark brown boot polish as her mascara had run out and she’d not been out for a while to buy more Annie ran the last few yards and darted like an eel into Mary’s 1970’s kitchen. What on earth are you doing,dear? Mary asked her.Those shoes look unsuitable for leading anyone up the garden path.Mind you,I do like them Oh,I’ll explain,Annie said huskily. I told that therapist across the road I was living with you. What exactly do you mean by living,Mary aanxiou Well,he said